


And This Is Nothing That I Do

by Piachichi



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Bromance, Drabbles, Gen, Humor, M/M, bit of Gryles, bit of Larry, bit of Niam, bit of Tomlinshaw, don't read it for the romance, nothing explicit though, these are drabbles anyway, too short for ships
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-15
Updated: 2014-05-02
Packaged: 2018-01-19 12:49:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 1,200
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1470457
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Piachichi/pseuds/Piachichi
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Louis nodded seriously, “I don't know if you should be offended by that or glad that he doesn't.”</p>
<p>“Why would I be offended?”, Harry asked, looking scandalised.</p>
<p>“Because it obviously means he doesn't like your taste”, Louis rolled his eyes, “But it also means you're stealing his clothes – because let's be honest, you never give them back – and he doesn't take any in return.”</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Sexuality

 

“I am having a sexuality crisis”, Niall announced somberly, "I assume I have too many gay friends.”

Louis blinked, “How come?”

“I've been sleeping with this lad for a while”, Niall held up a hand before Louis had the chance to interrupt, “But I don't fancy touching _your_ dick at all.”

“You usually have your sexuality crisis before sleeping with a guy”, Louis smiled disbelievingly, “How long has this been going on?”

“Well, about six months, give or take a few weeks. Around once a week usually.”

Louis gaped, “Sorry to break it to you, mate, but you're not straight.”

 


	2. Sexuality II

“I think I'm not gay. Nor bi. Do you think I'm straight and he's an exception?”, Niall asked, sitting down next to his friend wearing an unusually serious expression.

“That's ridiculous. There are no exceptions”, Louis groaned, “You like his dick. You're frequently having sex with a guy. You are _not_ straight.”

“I don't want to touch your dick, though. I don't even want to touch Zayn's dick and he's the prettiest guy I know!”, Niall exclaimed desperately.

“Well, I'm definitely gay. That doesn't mean I fancy touching your dick, either. Wouldn't say the same about Zayn, though”, Louis shrugged.

 


	3. Sexuality III

“I really don't think this is going to work”, Zayn said.

“It's a great idea. You're here as moral support, so start acting a little supportive!”, Louis ordered, glaring at him.

“I think it's sick. How does it work again?”, Niall asked, looking around the club excitedly.

“We sit here, look at every guy and determine if you want to get in his pants or not”, Louis explained impatiently.

Zayn huffed.

Niall nodded, “Point someone out then!”

“How about the blonde behind Zayn?”, Louis asked, “He's fit.”

Niall shook his head, “Not feeling a single sexy feeling.”

Zayn visibly cringed.

 


	4. Ticket

“Thanks for waiting with me”, Harry said.

Louis raised his eyebrow, “When have I ever not waited with you?”

Harry blinked, “You never do.”

“Well, I never do if I have to catch my own bus.”

“No, you never do”, Harry repeated.

“Whatever”, Louis turned away to look at the departure board, “You have five minutes left.”

“Do you remember where I put my ticket?”, Harry asked, searching his pockets.

“I think I didn't take my ticket out of the machine”, he mumbled after a while.

Louis gaped, “You what?”

“I think I left my ticket upstairs in the machine.”

 


	5. Spanish

“I'm going to refresh my Spanish skills!”, Niall announced loudly.

“Did you sign up for a class? That's a great idea”, Liam said, “I'd quite like knowing some Spanish. It's a good language.”

“I didn't sign up for a bloody class”, Niall considered his friend with a confused look, “I found this sick website where you get XP for studying and can reach a high streak of days studied continuously, which you get points for, which you can trade in for extra gadgets like lessons on flirting. It's a bit like a video game!”

“Oh, I see”, Liam nodded demurely.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you want to learn Spanish (or French, Italian, German or Portuguese) like Niall, visit duolingo.com.


	6. Spanish II

Liam was sitting on the sofa, quietly reading a text book when Niall excitedly hopped onto the seat next to him.

“Qué lees, Liam?”, he asked with a wide grin.

“Excuse me?”, Liam looked up hesitantly.

“I'm learning question words. Got me a 10 day streak, too. I already tried the flirting lesson, but that's too many new words. Couldn't bother remembering all of those.”

Liam nodded, trying to look as impressed as possible.

“Qué lees?”, Niall repeated.

“Sí”, Liam answered.

Niall clapped him on the shoulder with a laugh, getting up as quickly as he'd sat down, “Adiós, amigo!”

 


	7. Sharing

“That's Nick's sweater you're wearing, isn't it?”, Louis asked.

Harry looked down on himself, “It is. I like his clothes.”

“He never borrows yours in return, though, does he?”

“I don't think he ever has, no.”

Louis nodded seriously, “I don't know if you should be offended by that or glad that he doesn't.”

“Why would I be offended?”, Harry asked, looking scandalised.

“Because it obviously means he doesn't like your taste”, Louis rolled his eyes, “But it also means you're stealing his clothes – because let's be honest, you never give them back – and he doesn't take any in return.”

 


	8. Endearments

Louis had agreed to meet Harry's very weird friends in a very weird bar. He looked around in disapproval, deciding on the spot that this wasn't a place he would ever visit again.

“Nick!”, Harry shouted, sounding absolutely delighted.

Louis kept a safe distance while Harry greeted a dozen people and tapped his foot impatiently until his friend came back over to him, Nick in tow.

“Well, if it isn't Lewis”, Nick smirked.

Harry rolled his eyes fondly.

“Just so you know, I used to call myself that all the time. It's basically an approved nickname”, Louis said, smiling sweetly.

 


	9. Primark

„Holy Jesus, this is not normal“, Louis said.

„Calm down, love, nobody's dying.“

„Nobody has died _yet_.“

Nick rolled his eyes, „This is how it usually works in here. You'll get used to it after a while.“

Louis turned around and just narrowly avoided stepping on a girl sitting crossed-legged on the floor surrounded by piles of clothing. He gave an exasperated huff and crossed his arms, „I think I'm done here. It's not like there's a men's department anyway. Let's get ice-cream.“

„It's upstairs, we'll at least have a look. You can't leave Lottie alone in this hell-hole, anyway.“

 


	10. Priorities

“We need to go out.”

“Louis, I'm studying”, Liam sighed.

“I already asked Niall and he's in. We _need_ to go out. Especially you.”

“This is important. We can go out after the exams, alright? Or you could just ask Zayn, he's always up for it.”

“Zayn is studying and won't budge!”, Louis whined, “You're my last chance.”

“Why can't you just go out with Niall?”, Liam asked, frowning, “And why do you listen to Zayn telling you he needs to study and not to me?”

Louis groaned loudly, “Whatever. I'm going with Niall. You will regret this so much.”

 


	11. Money

“I found a lovely new restaurant when I was out with Daisy yesterday. It's perfect for Saturday”, Nick suggested.

Louis groaned, “We really don't need to go out. We could order some take-out and stay in.”

Nick raised an eyebrow, “You're being quite cheap, aren't you? Are you low on money suddenly? Do you want me to take _you_ out, then?”

Louis snorted.

“I could buy you if I wanted to”, he said, grinning deviously.

“Well, you can afford going to a restaurant on our anniversary then. I am not accepting a night in”, Nick insisted, finality in his voice.

 


	12. Morals

“Haz, come look at this. It's hilarious!”, Louis called.

Harry came into the room, carrying a tray of half-finished sandwiches. Louis glanced at them, then turned his laptop and started a video.

“What are they doing?”, Harry asked, absentmindedly laying out salad on his sandwiches.

“They're giving these pretentious hipster kids fake band names and asking what they think about those. Just listen.”

Harry gasped, “That's horrible. They will be so humiliated!”

“That's the point. Need to teach those pricks a lesson.”

“No, we shouldn't watch this and laugh about them”, Harry murmured disapprovingly and promptly closed the browser window.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And that's it. ;)


End file.
